Sorry, I Had To Fire You For Being Hot

This is for everyone who thinks I’m joking when I say that women who are in any way up-front about their sexuality (ie refuse to wear that modern version of the burqa, the ill-fitting grey suit) face workplace discrimination.

“These judges sent a message to Iowa women that they don’t think men can be held responsible for their sexual desires and that Iowa women are the ones who have to monitor and control their bosses’ sexual desires,” said attorney Paige Fiedler. “If they get out of hand, then the women can be legally fired for it.”

Yeah, just like it’s our fault for having boobs.

I join my sister, Jessica Simpson, and Katy Perry as women who were all but kicked out of church because our bodies “tempted” young men – leaving the latter entertainers little choice but to exploit their bodies. Boobs are an asset only in professions, like entertainment, where earning power correlates directly to sexual desirability. For the rest of us, they are a liability and a trap.

We have to be attractive enough to find a partner and to look good on television, but ugly enough not to make the horndogs we work with uncomfortable. My boobs have preceded me in every room I’ve ever walked into, and many times I’ve thought about paying to make them disappear. At least now, after this ruling, I can say that and not be told that I’m making it up.

2 thoughts on “Sorry, I Had To Fire You For Being Hot

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